r/HumansBeingBros 4d ago

Helping a feral kitten to become friendly.

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31.3k Upvotes

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818

u/Not_NSFW-Account 4d ago Gold

My wife ran a county animal control unit. This was my job, since I worked from home and apparently emit just the right calm safeness for cats to respond to.

She would bring them and release them in my office, where they could hide and get used to me. On breaks I would sit on the floor and talk to them. They get used to me and stop being afraid of my presence.
Once I get blinks while talking to them, I begin to lay down and put a hand near their hidey spot and continue talking. Eventually I will start getting head bumps on that hand.
that is when I can sit and offer treats while i talk. Toss one near the kitty while we are both calm. they check it out and monch. Maybe another, then back to chilling. Over the next few days, the treats are closer, till they will take them from my hand.

At that point, I can usually present a hand and get bumped.
Once they voluntarily crawl in my lap or lay against me, the pets can be offered.
Once comfortable with being aproached and petted, introduce others. The daughter, the super-calm kittly loving Boxer. let them associate and get friendly. Now they can be adopted, they will be at least cautiously friendly to strangers.

A kitten takes a couple weeks minimum. older cats can take months. An abused cat may never fully trust again. but they can adapt to not being afraid. these are often a good barn cat for local farmers. Happy to be around people and have a job. And sometimes after a long time they get friendly with the farmer.

2.7k

u/laeti88 4d ago

I don’t really care if the person in the video didn’t use the exact right method to approach the cat, glad this little one was saved and now apparently got used to humans (who hopefully will keep treating him good). He has sad and cute eyes, makes me feel like deep inside he was starving for contact and affection! Thanks to the person who saved him and made him more comfortable little by little.

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u/danc4498 4d ago

So... What is the right method? I believe I'll be saving all the feral kittens.

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u/rocketshipray 4d ago edited 3d ago Keep Calm Heartwarming

Background context for how I know the following works well without causing stress to the kitties and then the requested information:

We have a feral colony in the woods near our house and my partner and I both try to help local TNR (trap-neuter-release) groups for the adult cats and we try to get as many of the kittens out as we can when they’ve been weaned (if we can’t get the Mama Cat to come with us - we don’t separate from the Mama Cat if we have the option not to). We have also had some litters dropped off by the Mama Cats on our porch and deck which is neat.

I’m gonna put the link to a nice write-up (not mine) of the instructions we follow here. We’ve been using these techniques for over a decade now and the lady who wrote this was pretty spot-on. She also has a good YouTube summary video here. If you can’t access her site or the YT video, the most important info is copied below. It’s really important to try to not separate nursing kittens from their mom so I’m just copying out the part that would have been more appropriate for the kitten in the video. It could be a large breed kitten, but I’m pretty sure it’s at least 5+ weeks old. Sorry if this formats weird, I’m on mobile.

Step-By-Step Socialization

Session One: Introduce Yourself From a Distance

  • Place the food in front of the kitten and back away. Stand as far away as it takes for the kitten to be comfortable eating in front of you.

  • While the kitten eats, speak to him in a gentle tone. Stay visible to him throughout the first meal.

  • Once he has had a full meal, pick up the leftovers.

    Next Session(s): Get Closer Bit By Bit

  • Place food in front of the kitten. Try to stand closer each time, gradually decreasing the distance from him as he eats.

  • Continue talking to him throughout the entire meal.

    Next Session(s): Hand Feed

  • Hold the food dish while the kitten eats.

  • Try holding food in your hand or on a spoon.

  • Continue talking to him throughout the entire meal.

    Next Session(s): Introduce Touch

  • Start gently touching the kitten while he eats. Focus on favorite areas like head, cheeks, and the base of the tail.

  • Take small steps towards holding the kitten. Place hands on her sides and lift.

  • Eventually, you should be able to hold the kitten.

    Final steps: Keep Introducing New Experiences

  • Continue taking baby steps for any new stimuli.

  • Be mindful that toys can be scary! Introduce new objects gradually to build confidence.

  • Start introducing the kitten to other people so that she learns to trust humans more broadly.

Edit: Tried to fix some formatting issues and am engaging in the final steps with the first feral kitten we’re gonna adopt. We’re usually really good about not adopting the fosters and rescues that end up with us because the fewer animals we have that are part of our permanent household, the more resources we have for fosters. But this kitten chose us this time so we can’t let go.

Word vomit that I can’t contain because I love this little shithead even though he just attacked my toes: We love this little kitty so much. He didn’t need any socialization help with my partner but was not okay with any other human or animal for a while. He took a shine to my partner and would try to nurse on them when we first got him. His whole litter was left on our deck by their mom during a freeze before they were totally weaned (we have little shelter areas) and he decided my partner was his new Mama. It’s pretty cute, he still tries to nurse on my partner’s chest hair sometimes. Right now he’s playing with this little set of felted, catnip-filled toys that look like foods. His favorite is the pepperoni pizza slice.

Edit 2 - Can no longer comment, but to /u/heeheehymn below: Your response is absolutely not appropriate in rescue and socialization groups. If you were able to "tame" the kitten in one day, that kitten was not a feral kitten. Also, fuck off.

Edit 3: /u/thepetoctopus - baby tax This was after playtime and he's all stretched out. :D

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u/thepetoctopus 4d ago

Great advice for feral kittens. I haven’t fostered in years but this is the approach I took as well.

Also, we need the baby tax!

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u/Tomnnn 4d ago

I wonder if I got lucky with mine or it's just really easy when they're young. I found one in a bush with blue eyes that turned yellow a few days after abduction, so she was VERY young.

She hissed so I went home and put on some oven mitts and then came back and only had to pet like 3 times for the hissing to stop. Moved her to a cardboard box for transport and she was purring when we took her out a little after that.

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u/piratehalloween2020 4d ago

This is how we tamed our feral! We caught her around 6 months so she was a tough case and I foster failed. She’s the snuggliest lap cat now and honestly the best cat I’ve ever had. Another important tip is just don’t look at them for long. Definitely don’t stare them in the face. We kept ours in a large dog crate in our wfh office with a blanket on her most of the time with one side uncovered. She got used to us just kind of being around pretty quickly. I did a lot of sitting outside the cage and playing with her through the bars with wand toys. I also used a pair of leather welding gloves sprayed with calming pheromones every time I’d feed her or clean the litter. Cat scratches are no joke! She was pretty confused about a lot of things at first and it took her three years to learn that she could meow for help or attention. She still does more squeaking than anything. She also loves being pet through bars still, so her favorite thing is to lean on the stair rails while I’m on the other side and be cuddled xD

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u/MoonHunterDancer 4d ago

Found ours past 6 months. Didn't know if she was feral or belonged to someone until The Deep Freeze hit and she was the only one still appearing in our yard for food and water. She was still feral and would go to other people houses too, but eventually we could pet her. Then she bolted inside one day and went like, "It feels nice in here." The cats we already have were like "WTF," and we were going "no, you need a vet check first!".

No diseases, so now she is an unmovable brick upstairs.

41

u/lemonsweetsrevenge 4d ago

Don’t try to pet them over their heads; notice the success started on day 5 when reaching in to pet from the side.

Predators of cats, like raptor birds, grab them with claws from above, so a frightened cat doesn’t trust your claw-like hand reaching over them.

Lots of gentle soothing sounds and slow, sleepy-type eye blinks will help you as well.

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u/jerstud56 4d ago

spspspsp

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u/DNRTannen 4d ago

You got it all backwards, it's pspspspsps everyone knows that

90

u/Alwaysinadaze 4d ago

Reverse psychology

134

u/PinocchiosWood 4d ago

Reverse *pspsychology

13

u/Gonz_UY 4d ago

Take my upvote and get out

6

u/OhTen40oZ 4d ago

Thank you for saying something, I didn't want to be "that guy". Some people are so ignorant when it comes to cats. Ugh.

905

u/BowsersItchyForeskin 4d ago Gold

The vid maker is using Flooding, an older technique where an element of learned helplessness is used as a transition point into desensitization, which takes time to wear off and sometimes leaves a long-term anxiety that can take months to fully resolve.
A more modern approach would be to allow the kitten to build confidence through graduated exposure, coupled with giving the kitten its own smart phone playing Bob Ross and Mr. Rogers videos, interspersed with the occasional rendition of Toto's "Africa" played on kazoo and vuvuzela.

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u/DaBABYateMAdingo 4d ago

Got me good, fucker

82

u/DeceiverOfNations 4d ago

If it was any longer I would have thought it was /u/shittymorph

30

u/HGpennypacker 4d ago

What you want to do is earn the trust of the the kitty to lure it up on top of a steel cage where, well, you know the rest.

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u/ListenerNius 4d ago

I tried playing Africa on the vulva once. I was not given a second opportunity.

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u/danc4498 4d ago

You got links to the Africa on kazoo or vuvuzela?

13

u/Anon_Alcoholic 4d ago

I got something better

https://youtu.be/HuiwIFLKa2I

2

u/danc4498 4d ago

Bookmarked!

1

u/flouny_floa 4d ago

Don't worry guys, It's not a rickroll. I checked.

17

u/physalisx 4d ago

Fuck man I was getting pissed off reading that. Got me good.

4

u/exzyle2k 4d ago

First time I've ever heard of a vuvuzela designed to combat rage. Usually it's used to induce rage.

Your ideas are intriguing to me, and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

3

u/nudgie68 4d ago

You son if a gun, you had me. Good one!

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u/Intrepid_Talk_8416 4d ago

Look up jackson galaxy, or ‘cat from hell’ a lot less stress and faster results.

40

u/EggAtix 4d ago edited 4d ago Helpful

TL;DR: cat tips from someone who thinks they are an expert I guess. Didn't realize it was gonna be this long 😳

Brief training, and years of owning what was previously the world's grumpiest cat, I've got a standard playbook that always serves me well. The big thing to remember with cats is that, unlike dogs, they are firmly in the middle of the food chain, and a scared one is in "don't get hunted" mode (which is why cats are almost always aggressive in self defense, and then flee, opposed to territorial/hostile behavior in dogs). That means you have to be non-threatening and convince the cat you aren't there to eat it or hurt it. Reaching claw like fingers coming at the cat from above triggers basically every "oh god a bird of prey" instinct in their little bodies. Cats don't like being below things, and they don't like being restrained, so claw like hands reaching into a cage from above is basically the worst possible approach.

If the cat is scared, get low and avoid eye contact to make yourself less spooky, and then reach a closed hand towards them, try not to have your arm extend from above, try to approach from Infront of them, below or at their level, but don't touch them. 90% of the time, even scared cats will be curious enough to move forward and give you a sniff, which is how cat greetings start. If they don't freak out, or even better if they nuzzle your hand, you can rub them back with a knuckle/edge of hand mimicking how they nuzzled you.

Moving your hand behind their plane of view, or above them, will scare most cats off at this point. Unless the cat exposes it's back by rubbing against you or turning around, this is as far as I would go. If you can't even get this far, I know some people will basically put a puffball on a stick, and let the cat smell it, and rub it's cheeks on that from afar until it's more comfy.

Once they arent instantly scared of you, you can use your ape fingers to give those primo, homer Simpson over a box of donuts, dont-mind-if-i-do ass scritches. My go-to is almost always gently kind of rub-grab-scratching the loose skin on the back of their neck in a massaging way. It tends to calm most cats down, and if they get suddenly furious for cat reasons, your hand is out of the line of fire.

Also, some cats LOVE back scratches and base-of-tail scratches, but it's very sensitive, and it's overwhelming for many others. The prey thing is important to remember when handling a cat too. Most cats get instantly uncomfortable when they aren't in control, so if you pick them up, make sure their feet are supported, and don't flip them over. Having their tummy exposed against their will is a big ‼️moment for most kitties.

Cat psychology is super interesting and worth looking into. If you watch how momma cats socialize/discipline their kittens, you can mimic those methods to train problematic behaviors like over-aggression out of your cats, and if you know how to meet them halfway on their insecurities, you can train most cats to be okay with strangers, to be okay with being picked up/handled, and to be very social companions.

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u/summonsays 4d ago

So I'm not sure if it's the "right way" but my grandma had some semi feral cats that happened to live at her house when they felt like it. Sometimes there were kittens. You really need to just go all in and ignore the claws. This slow approach where you jerk back if they swat at you, it's bad. 1) Slow cautious approach, they will see you as a threat because you're acting like one. 2) also reinforces that what they're doing works. So put on a thick glove or if you don't mind getting scratched up forgo that and just reach in an pet them. If you want them to be able to be picked up or held later in life you need to get them used to that at this stage as well.

The key to remember is cats don't communicate verbally by default, they're all about body language. Be relaxed, don't make jerky moves, be confident in your movements and ignore their protests. Also this is only for kittens, adult cats need to be treated differently.

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u/meltedlaundry 4d ago

Also this is only for kittens, adult cats need to be treated differently.

That is unless you don't mind a completely redesigned arm

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u/demonknightdk 4d ago

My dad found this out the hard way lol. We lived in the country, 7 acres about 1/4 or so wooded, with a creek running through it, it was great. Any way mom got a couple cats, they made a couple dozen more, one of them had her kittens some where in the woods, she brought them up to eat as mother cats do, but they always ran off so no one ever got a really handle on them, as they got older they got used to being around people, but never actually being handled, well my dad after a few beers, decided he was tired of them crapping in random places (his tools, my moms cats hated my dad for some reason, they actively targeted him it was fucking hilarious) so one walks by him as he's sitting in his lawn chair, he reaches out and grabs it by the back of the neck skin, that little fuck whips around and rips his fore arm to fucking hell, it was like a god damn 80's horror movie, didn't help he was on blood thinners, and had been drinking (he also didn't listen to his heart dr. how he's still alive at 73 i don't know.) after that he bough some live traps and relocated the feral little tykes to my aunts 100+ acre farm. the momma cats got spayed that year too. lol.

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u/driatic 4d ago

Adult cats demand that you treat them differently

7

u/P4azz 4d ago

That's kinda how we did it when we found feral cats as kids. Picked them up and cuddled with them (probably too much, very young).

We were constantly around the kitten we eventually took home and frequently picked her up and cradled her.

When she was grown-up she would not be averse to being picked up and often just sleep on your chest or back, follow you around on walks and just chill in the yard or on the roof.

So it definitely worked. Only time she was mad was whenever I removed ticks, but she also calmed down rather quickly afterwards. Sometimes I like to kid myself into thinking she realized the bugs were gone and I helped her.

8

u/Legionof1 4d ago

DO NOT USE THIS METHOD TO GET A GIRLFRIEND.

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u/Jaci98 4d ago

Well I fostered 2 feral kitten siblings. They had some confidence because they weren't alone and also they didn't try to attack me. But they did growl and hiss at me. They got the whole kitchen for themselves (kittenfied obviously) with some nice new comfy sleeping spots. I would only desensitize them to my presence and voice in the beginning by spending lots of time in the room, talking and feeding them close to me.

After a while I started touching them very slowly while they were eating and started initiating playing with some toys. They warmed up to the touching during meals and soon I could touch them without food at all but they weren't completely sure about it then. But I continued and intensified the cuddling during meals and even started lightly lifting them up while they were eating. After getting used to this I tried to touch them as much as possible. Never played with my hands. Played a lot with toys and still were only feeding them from my hands or while petting them.

After a month and a few days I could put them inside my sweater and carry them around. Lift them up and cuddle them like babies. Since they were really young and not yet used to actually enjoying petting, they would purr in confusion and get too excited and try to playfully attack me. So I always tried to really make them tired with play, feed them, cuddle. Which worked pretty well. The Kitten lady on YouTube has a great video about this topic.

1

u/PowerfulPickUp 4d ago

It’s always worked for me when I’ve found feral kittens- avoid too many scratches at bites (claws and teeth are needles) hold and pet them for a few minutes and they’ll start to purr- Boom! They love you.

1

u/GeneralLynx3 4d ago

Watch The Kitten Lady on YouTube. She’s a wealth of experience and information on feral cats, kittens in general and where to find resources.

3

u/Camphorus 4d ago Heartwarming

I donated to this lady on Instagram, it’s @rose_avila or something. Anyway, she’s a lone woman living in a rental that spends her free time single-handedly helping local strays and doing TNR. Really generous lady that clearly cares a lot for these animals

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u/VVolfang 4d ago

As others said, there was a slightly better way. I only came to say that I hope people realize humans are also like this. Time, patience, love, and understanding.

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u/aurashift2 4d ago

I wish somebody would de-feralize me :(

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u/trekuwplan 4d ago

Do you promise not to chew my hand off?

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u/Sybirhin 4d ago

No

34

u/trekuwplan 4d ago

I will take that risk and pet you against your will!

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u/a_shootin_star 4d ago

hisssssssssss

15

u/trekuwplan 4d ago

It's okay buddy!

3

u/Purple_W1TCH 4d ago

Wait...I only see a bonus, here!

5

u/Hour_Beat_6716 4d ago

HISSSS 🐱

41

u/Boredandtiredbroke 4d ago

Food is always the answer. Controlled feeding times will always work for ferals.

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u/Jouchii 4d ago

If possible always approach a scared animal with an open palm facing upward, comes off less threatening. Awesome work nonetheless.

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u/---ShineyHiney--- 4d ago

Also, it’s not a dog

I understand going above the head puts you slightly farther from the bitey parts and gives you more reaction time to pull away, but cats don’t like when you come at them over head

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u/P4azz 4d ago

I think "introduction" is the important part. I used to hold out my hand and let her smell it, before I went for the pet. After that she didn't really mind to be pet on top of her head and if she wanted to be pet a different way she'd adjust.

They just don't like surprises and uncertainty. After knowing you're there and who you are, they don't really mind the headpats as much. Just make it overtly clear it's you touching the top of their head.

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u/lilpopjim0 4d ago

No animal does. It blocks their line of sight to your eyes.

-14

u/communistkangu 4d ago

I've had one cat ever where that was true and I must've had over 20 in my life time (grew up on a farm)

10

u/---ShineyHiney--- 4d ago edited 4d ago

Also have a farm

The indoor family cats were better, but I none of our barn cats have ever let you come at them overhand. All were rescues from the shelter who had to be conditioned to humans like the video

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u/IC-23 4d ago

37

u/ChubbyLilPanda 4d ago

Facing upwards, not downwards

14

u/mbz321 4d ago

and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom!

9

u/_MostlyHarmless 4d ago

So like this?

4

u/willard_saf 4d ago

Exactly it also helps if you have an obnoxiously large pinky ring and you spent your last 10 paychecks on a Rolex to go with your tracksuit.

3

u/Drake750254 4d ago

Oh, so baiting them into thinking that we have a treat in our hands

32

u/KWCRosin 4d ago

A feral animal couldn't care less if you had a treat or not. It's whether they perceive your action as threatening or not.

Food could just make them think you're luring them

-1

u/Senor_Habitat 4d ago

OMG, you sir/miss win the comment of the day for me! 😂

12

u/FowD9 4d ago

this is such horrible advice literally the opposite of what you should do. no, animals aren't human

WE as humans do that to show that to each other to show we mean no harm because we have nothing in our hands to harm you

however for an animal it doesn't matter

in fact, you should never approach a scared animal with your hand open. you shouldn't approach one to begin with. but if you must, do it with a closed fist or else risk losing a finger

22

u/NoConfusion9490 4d ago

It's true, I lost a finger when I was mauled in a vicious kitten attack.

-3

u/P4azz 4d ago

For cats that absolutely works. It's not about "showing you're unarmed" it's about providing a surface they can't easily attack. They need an angle to bite down otherwise they'll just smash their face into your flat hand.

At the same time the closer your hands get, the more they have a chance to smell and recognize it, if you've interacted with the cat before. After that it also offers them a surface to lick after which you know they're not gonna lash out at you.

8

u/FowD9 4d ago

that's the thing, reaching out to a scared animal like this isn't to show you mean no harm by having your palm open (that's not a thing for feral animals), it's to give them a chance so pick up your scent, you can and should do that with a closed fist if you're going to

-1

u/Individual_Basket_55 4d ago

What if it's a lion?

277

u/MayorCharlesCoulon 4d ago edited 4d ago

Lol we have fostered for years and cats are different from dogs, the hand “approach” doesn’t matter (palm up or down), it’s getting them used to touch. Putting one finger on their head or neck and working up to pets like this is fine.

We found the key to get them to warm up is delicious canned kitten food. Kittens cannot resist it so you put a little spoonful in a dish towards the front of the crate and start with goo goo noises and then light touches while they eat. It can take as little as a week for them to warm up, they loooove the wet food.

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u/cramboneUSF 4d ago

My wife and I have fostered kittens for our local SPCA and 2 local rescues on and off over the years. Can confirm about wet food, it’s the one weakness that can make a lion a kitten again.

10

u/DrKat_CatDr 4d ago

Bribery is the best way to win an animals’ heart! Thank you for the foster work you do ❤️

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u/Oracle_of_Knowledge 4d ago

You really kinda rest-of-the-owl'ed it there at the end.

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u/Shaushage_Shandwich 4d ago

They were like "oh shit we should stop triggering this cat all the time and just keep feeding it until it likes us"

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u/chirpchirpreformed 4d ago

Poor baby, hope it never feels that way again

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u/Scrubosaurus13 4d ago

Who downvoted you for being sympathetic towards an adorable cat??

109

u/ThePainfullyBad 4d ago

i feel like just suddenly putting your hand over it's head isnt what you're meant to do

like damn i'd be scared and pissed if some giant thing came out of the sky towards me too

20

u/summonsays 4d ago

It's basically forced exposure therapy. It can work if done correctly.

-18

u/_an-account 4d ago

That's not how exposure therapy works. If it's forced, then you're just triggering the nervous system and there's no actual therapy.

20

u/DashingDino 4d ago

Actually it is the right way because being too careful or tentative will just reinforce the defensive/aggressive behavior and they may never get used to being touched and petted

4

u/accidentallysexual 4d ago

I'm sure it's fine since they're getting used to touch, but dang the way they just kept pointing a finger right at their face lol I was like...uh that looks very threatening and unnerving. Can we do this a little differently? 😅

33

u/eharper9 4d ago

I made feral cats nice by petting them while they were eating.

10

u/Allegorist 4d ago

A cat can't really be "feral" this young, it's a state of mind that is a result of years of conditioning, fending for itself, and constantly avoiding danger. While I'm sure it's technically feral as in they found it living outside, it's more or less just a grumpy kitten at this stage in the process.

21

u/RickedSab 4d ago

He just accepted his fate and tolerated the human. Still look pissed off tho 😆

15

u/ZarquonsFlatTire 4d ago edited 4d ago

Working at a garden center there was a feral kitten in the barn. The boss tasked me with catching it and adopting it out to a customer. When you work for a small company (like 4 employees small) you sometimes get asked to do weird shit. He said jokingly I had a month to find it a home.

So when I went to lunch I bought an extra cheeseburger, then crumbled the patty by the pallet of burlap sacks it liked to hang out under. Came back an hour later and found one passed out kitten on top of the sacks.

Snatched up the hissing spitting little monster thing and took it into the office. Named him Dusty, because a filthy grey kitten covered in cobwebs.

Within one week that kitten was sleeping on the counter by the register while I rang up customers and pouncing at the pen when they signed credit receipts. Week and a half and some lady bought 6 daylilys and got a free kitten with purchse.

Suck it Walt, I pulled it off 20 days early!

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u/[deleted] 4d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/maccabop 4d ago

Yeah I was watching thinking this animal would have been tamed in half the time if it wasn’t for the hand of god blocking out the sun everyday

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u/gloomyblurgh 4d ago

idk why you got downvoted, this was painful to watch and i 100% agree with you

4

u/enz1ey 4d ago

Yeah I caught a feral kitten that looked to be about the same size/age and I just basically gave it free roam of an entire area in my basement. I'd spend time down there with it but I'd let it approach me instead of the other way around.

It took substantially less time to tame it, maybe like a week tops? Ended up giving it to my wife's friend and she said it's been the best cat ever since.

It was also polydactyl which was kind of cool.

22

u/Scrubosaurus13 4d ago

I mean it worked and the cat looks happy at the end.

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u/TheDarkestCrown 4d ago

In general it’s not a good idea though, even if it ended up working this time. Sometimes cats will develop a semi permanent hate/fear of hands if someone tries to tame them this way. They’re tiny compared to us so it freaks them out if they aren’t used to human touch from a very young age

17

u/HOVRS_OF_FVN 4d ago

Even pet cats prefer it if you're crouched down instead of standing up, especially if they aren't your cats.

12

u/TheDarkestCrown 4d ago

Funny you say that, because I'm disabled (double amputee) so I'm the smol human of my family and the cat lets only me hold/cuddle him like a baby. Everyone else? Nope, he's running away lol

5

u/HOVRS_OF_FVN 4d ago

Exactly. In my case I befriended one of our most recent cats by lying flat on the floor and talking to her in a soft voice a bunch. Since she was hiding under things a lot of the time, I didn't really have much of a choice. But I got curious as to if it made a difference and started to pay more attention to it and experimented by lying down next to her and sitting whenever I noticed she was tense around me. Hard to say of course but I feel that that's a big reason why today she's extremely attached to me.

4

u/---ShineyHiney--- 4d ago

Well we’ve found your superpower now

Now how will you use this?

2

u/TheDarkestCrown 4d ago

I must teach him to become the supreme world overlord. BRB gotta go get the treats

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u/[deleted] 4d ago

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u/AlHammadi 4d ago

what if my cat meets my hand 80% of the time but 20% of the time acts like my hand is out to kill him

2

u/numberonebuddy 4d ago

Isn't the closing of the eyes a sign of trust? It's not at the level yet of jumping up and headbutting the hand, but it's still closing its eyes and chilling.

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u/falbi23 4d ago

Because not everyone is an insufferable animal "expert" like you and every other Reddit "vet" out there. Go back to reading PETA articles.

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u/Anachron101 4d ago

Pretending that PETA and people who know basics about how to deal with animals are in any way related is.....well just look at the downvotes and then reconsider being this stupid

4

u/rocketshipray 4d ago

It doesn’t take an expert to know that you shouldn’t approach a cat who is unfamiliar to you like that. Especially one that’s not been socialized. This is something most people with or around cats understand and sharing that knowledge with people who might not have exposure to unfamiliar cats is not being “insufferable.”

It seems like you’re taking some personal issues out on the other user from the tone of your comment and you should examine that.

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u/[deleted] 4d ago

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u/deathangel687 4d ago edited 4d ago

I'm not an expert and even I know doing it that way is something they don't like. Let me get back to reading my peta articles

11

u/Keltoigael 4d ago

I am glad it worked out but that is a terrible approach to pet a cat. Never go over with your hand. Let them sniff you and present them with the back of your hand and its EZPZ.

5

u/anexistentuser 4d ago

“Ok, maybe this whole petting thing ain’t so bad.”

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u/morelikepambabely 4d ago edited 4d ago

Among other things, don’t flick a cat’s whiskers.

Also OP is just a karma bot.

12

u/thisisminethereare 4d ago

As someone who has tamed feral cats I am not a fan of this forceful approach. Kittens are curious and playful. Use that to your advantage and they will become tame with a lot less stress for everyone.

7

u/AtomikSamurai310 4d ago

That's one spicy loaf.

5

u/who18 4d ago

Crazy to realize how quick they grow , in only 30 days the cat goes from small child to young adult size

3

u/thehazzanator 4d ago

I reckon my rescue cat was probably like this as a kitten. He's so terrified of strangers, especially men but generally everyone that's not us. It's hard to imagine how scared he was as a kitten

3

u/nancy_mikhaiel 4d ago

Kitty not having a good day on day 15.

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u/DuhhIshBlue 4d ago

I'd hiss too if someone was this bad at pats

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u/solesolosoul 4d ago

day 22 did it for me. was so powerful to see the kitty get distracted and playful while being pet

2

u/Filter55 4d ago

These used to be my favorite gatitos to work with. If I passed a cage and heard that tiny spit, it was cuddling time for the next few days.

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u/Better_Chard4806 4d ago

A little love goes a long way.

2

u/thatonepingu 4d ago

Can’t be the only one who thought those hisses were adorable.

4

u/bballjones9241 4d ago

Suddenly everyone in this thread is an animal expert

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u/---ShineyHiney--- 4d ago

Or has even just interacted with one cat ever

1

u/Dragmire_Afterlife 4d ago

People are trying to correct the person in the video but what the person did worked

1

u/bilgeparty 4d ago

It's amazing what love and affection can do for the spirit

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u/morts73 4d ago

It relaxes when it gets scritches behind the ears and begins to look forward to them in the end.

1

u/Elonsfatdukakas 4d ago

I am not that patient.

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u/mariboo_xoxo 4d ago

Bless you so very much for being kind, gentle & having patience with this with precious lil’ fur baby.

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u/NowieTends 4d ago

“Why does it keep doing this and why does it feel so good?”

1

u/SinisterMeatball 4d ago

I usually just use Temptation treats. Way faster and less injury.

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u/wonkey_monkey 4d ago

Just waiting for the Stockholm Syndrome to kick in.

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u/[deleted] 4d ago

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u/ggmerle666 4d ago

This is the way. My feral took about the same amount of time using the towel method. It's basically swaddling.

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u/Normandy_sr3 4d ago

This is the way

1

u/Skipperandscout 4d ago

Good for you!

1

u/ChunkArcade 4d ago

I would do anything for this level of patience... This person is truly commendable.